How Quickly Things Change

my wife and i have recently discovered that we’re going to have a baby. we scheduled an 8-week ultrasound appointment with her OB/GYN. she’s been sending me links to describing our baby’s development and size. it’s cute. and it’s been really exciting and a lot of fun.

since she works in medicine, she has been guarding against the potential letdowns — she aware of so many more ways a pregnancy can go wrong than i am — so she’s been referring to it as “the tissue” instead of “our baby” or “snow pea” as i am fond of. (she sent me an update when “the tissue” was the size of a snow pea.)

my heart kind of dropped yesterday: she sent me a text saying she had “cramps and some brown discharge. not good.” so we went to the OB/GYN for a spontaneous 6-1/2 week ultrasound yesterday. it’s not my body that is changing, so it’s naturally been a little more difficult to understand that there’s a baby growing inside her. nevertheless, i was prepared for disappointment. and a lot of time holding each other and being sad together.

the second i saw it on the ultrasound, i knew exactly what it was. a little fluttering on the monitor. a heartbeat. the doctor showed us and said it’s a heartbeat, even though, “it’s not really a heart, but more a cardiac tunnel.” he also showed us the yolk sac upon which the snow pea is feeding. but our baby is fine. we’re going to tell our parents tonight after we aborted our plans to tell them last night.

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