i’ve been doing my best to stay calm and positive. and i’m doing one heck of a job, i must say.
but the fears do creep in. of course, every gas pang i have i need to convince myself isn’t a uterine cramp. and i am still taking my temp every day to make sure it stays up…and ok, this is gross, but every time i pee, i am looking for any evidence of that sad red stuff.
but other than that, i’m doing pretty well.
except for the nightmares. i’ve had a couple recently centered around miscarrying. not actively in the process of it, just the idea of it. but the details never add up and when i wake up i kind of know it’s not real and am not too worried.
i feel a moment of panic every time we tell anyone our news. but then i’m also glad. i want an army of people out there with prayers and well wishes. maybe if everyone we know is sending our little wee one positive energy, good things will happen. and eventually maybe these dreams will stop and i’ll enjoy pregnancy?? we’ll see. 🙂
thank you, all. please keep it up.