The Things People Say/Penis Panic

so since we can breathe a little easier about the current health and wellness of the bebe, i can now move on to worrying about other things..

pink or blue? ponies or trucks? miniature cheerleading outfits or jerseys?

we’ve gotten a lot of flak for not finding out the sex of our little nugget. (i’m talking to you, lou).

and we’ve also gotten lots of guesses. there are so many superstitions and wives’ tales about predicting sex in utero….from how you’re carrying to which way the spoon swings over your tummy to heartburn to skin conditions.

earlier this week i was told that it must be a girl because “when you’re carrying a boy, you just jut out in front like a basketball, but when it’s a girl, you get round all over..and just look at how much your face has filled out.” 🙂 nice. (i will continue to update you on the dumb things people say out loud to pregnant women). i’ve also been told that it must be a girl because all my work friends are having boys and the universe has to equal out somehow. but then today 2 people predicted a boy. so i’m thinking that one of these two theories is correct. it will either be one or the other.

it’s honestly bothering everyone else more than it’s bothering me. i will say it again that i don’t think sex effects personality as much as we think it does. it only defines small parts of you. or that is what i want to believe. but really, i am more similar to robb than i am to most women i know, and vice versa. i’ve never understood those couples who, when with other couples, split off into girls/boys like a middle school dance. people are either interesting to me or they are not. it has little to do with whether or not they also have ovaries.

HOWEVER, i will admit that all along i’ve secretly assumed that it will be a girl. i was a girl. and my sisters were both…girls. and most of my cousins are girls. so i know more what to do with girl small people. and i have this conviction about raising up the next generation of strong, powerful, interesting, dynamic girls who can hold their own in the world. i guess i assume that boys automatically have those traits, or that society encourages them in boys so i don’t have to nurture them as much. and i automatically assume that girls are good listeners, and are sensitive to others’ needs. so those traits that i stereotypically assume are lacking in one sex or the other are what i would want to reinforce with my own kid. does that make sense?

plus, i have this growing fear of mother/son relationships as they can be pretty bizarre. i just really don’t want to make my son into norman bates, you know? please don’t let me. if you see the signs, call the authorities. and i don’t want to be outnumbered. i worry that a boy will be into boy stuff that i just don’t understand. i am piss poor at video games. i hate football on tv. i prefer to talk it out than punch it out. and i fear wearing an apron, slaving in the kitchen while all the men in the house sit on their duffs. (on the other hand, i like rolling around in the dirt and am not at all opposed to eating boogers).

but there i go again, being all sexist and predicting a stereotype that doesn’t play out in my own life. robb is an excellent communicator, does half of the housework, and doesn’t live his life for sports or video games. so i have no reason to believe that the two of us would raise a boy child to be the things that i fear.

and it’s not like i would better know what to do with a girly girl who wants to practice cheers all the time and braid each others hair.

i think that the gist of it is that now that i realize we might actually get to meet this kid i am starting to realize how much responsibility it is. not just to keep them alive, but to form them. whoa. to work within our own construct and sensibilities and life experiences without imposing all of our anxieties and neuroses on them? holy crap.

i should start my apologies now and saving up for some darned good therapy.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *