A Pregnant Chick’s Guide to Vegas

1. flying- to get there, i would say, if you can help it, do not fly Spirit Airlines (or, incidentally, Continental). the seats are wee tiny with no room to stretch or maneuver and there is no business/first class option so you can’t even splurge for comfort. plus, you have to pay for every little thing, so no free snacky cakes or ginger ale to settle your stomach. buy it all before you board. apparently both Delta and Frontier are roomier, therefore mo’ betta’ for the larger ladies (and dudes, for that matter). DO highly recommend wearing compression stockings for the flight. prevents swelling in your ankles/feet, blood clots, and discomfort. i bought mine through insurance at a durable medical equipment store, requires a prescription. they are thigh highs but you can get them in knee high or belly high options, also. PLUS do get up and walk around and stretch when you can. sleep on the plane can be aided by Dramamine, Benadryl, Tylenol PM, etc. read packaging/check with MD before taking anything that might be anti-fetus.

2. the best casino bathrooms are at New York New York and Paris. the worst, Circus Circus. always use ’em when you got ’em because these casinos are ginormous places and you might be traveling a large distance between destinations.

3. depending on where you live, you’re likely to experience a time change in Vegas. we were 3 hrs behind there where we are at home…so dinner reservations or showtime of 8pm is actually 11pm and you’re likely to fall asleep in your soup or while watching “the lion king.” sigh. it’s just the way it is. i noticed that baby’s usual big movement times were all out of wack, too, and i kept feeling like apologizing. 🙂 i think he/she will get over it.

4. comfortable shoes! do it. stay hydrated! do it.

5. smoking is not banned in vegas, so depending on how worrisome you’re being about second hand smoke, you might want to stay clear of the casino floors.

6. you know how people will buy and wear a cowboy hat when visiting texas? or, say, will get a sweatshirt with the canadian flag on it when visiting montreal? well, apparently girls visiting vegas think that the nevada state uniform is a whore outfit. the only thing actually covered on most of the tourists we saw was their calves and sometimes thighs from their tall hooker boots. otherwise, (most of) their lady parts bottom and top were covered (mostly) by a tube dress or short shorts and a halter top or something. and it was about 45 degrees at night. don’t let them influence you. wear your comfy clothes and shoes and if you, like all the other lady tourists to vegas, feel a need to let the world know you’re easy…i mean, you’re pregnant. we all know you put out, right? 🙂

7. you can’t booze it up and everyone around you is, so i recommend faking it with cranberry/lime juice cocktails in martini classes or virgin pina coladas. but there’s tons to do in vegas that doesn’t involved imbibing, so you shouldn’t feel too left out.

8. food! lots of great options, 24 hrs/day. calories could add up fast, but we walked a lot, so i think we balanced it out pretty well.

9. best time to go there? about now (early spring). weather never got over 70-ish, so i was happy in a t-shirt most of the time. if you went in august, you’re hating life regardless of who you are, but i’m thinking if you’re pregnant, you’re a puddle of you on the sidewalk or a whiny mess in the hotel room in front of the AC unit. best to avoid.

10. under-wire maternity/nursing bras are NOT COOL to go through the metal detector at the airport. it will go off and you will get molested by the friendly TSA officer. she might be perplexed by your compression stocking and belly band on your pants and you might have to explain that these are not harnesses for your weapons, but merely ways to accommodate your belly…which, by the way, is NOT a prosthetic piece meant to hide a WMD or something. and there’s a good possibility your family will start making jokes about your baby being some mutant straight from x-men made of titanium or something. nice, right?…on second thought, don’t be offended. that would be a great excuse for weight gain. 🙂

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