so, we went on a tour today of the labor & delivery unit and the postpartum mother/bebe rooms we will be using when i hatch at our local chosen hospital.
i’ve been there before both as a PA student and in a nearby wing, when i was a patient that fateful august stay 2 years ago. so i’m a little familiar, but i still wanted robb to see it in its entirety and to have a happy, normal reason to go.
and it was a great experience. as expected, everything was clean and organized and the staff was all incredibly friendly. it was all very positive and encouraging and i feel pretty excited to get there and get ‘er done, when the time comes.
in other news, i’ve been a total emotional mess this weekend. raging while driving just because i was still deep in the suburbs and just impatient to get home, crying in church, yelling at the robb, etc, etc. all over the map. most of it is hormones, i’m sure. part of it is that we’re having our lower floor painted in preparation to move bedrooms around and this project that was supposed to be done thursday is still in process, now sunday, with us unable to use most of our house. so i feel claustrophobic and inert. we’re all cloistered upstairs in one big guest room which was fun for a while, but has gotten really old since.
and i’m letting the stress of everything get to me. so many decisions yet to make, things to still line up, questions to answer…plus my body is less and less recognizable every day. hairy in places i can’t see or tame, expanding in strange and uncomfortable ways (like, seriously, have you ever seen an areola the size of a dinner plate? i have), etc, etc.
and i’m in this weird head space where the some 9 1/2 weeks i have left seems both like an eternity and like not nearly enough time.