I Found Henry’s Journal

mother, father….we need to talk.

lately i’ve been finding you very frustrating. the only word you seem to know is “no.” all i want is to have a little fun, and you are the killers of all my fun.

is it too much to ask that i be able to use my paper towel tube sword to lance everything in sight without you interfering? i swear i was only going to do it another 70 or 80 times and only planned to break a lot of the glass in my way.

i mean, relax. really. 

and while we’re on the subject, when i wake up and the first thing i want to do before my eyes are even open is watch “pingu” on your phone, just do us both a solid and pull your phone out, push the buttons and bring out that zany little penguin. just do it.

do it.

and you keep acting like stopping playing to eat dinner is a good idea and something i should be happily doing. well, i’m not happy about it at all. i have to leave my football where i found it and clean up all the puzzle pieces that i am PRETTY sure i didn’t even put there, and then eat beans and rice. and you sit there, stupidly acting like that is a treat or something? bitches, please. if you just gave me the pear that i asked you for, we wouldn’t be having this scene right now. i asked you for the pear 20 times. 20 times! i could not have been more clear.  i enunciated and everything. i said AND SIGNED the word please. i really don’t know what the problem is. we’re out of pears? what does that even mean? will an apple do? really? REALLY? if i offered you apple juice instead of mommy juice to drink, would that work for you? i thought not.

and now i have to show you how serious i am about this pear thing by throwing myself on the floor and sobbing. why must it always come to this? this is on you, mommy. this is on you.

so, in conclusion…..pingu and pears and we’ll all get along.

here’s some kisses to keep you coming back for more, 

henry j. monster


we’ve had some rather difficult moments recently with henry rebelling and fighting us and whining and big fake crying.  thankfully, because he is a wonderful, happy little sprite despite the two’s that he’s in, he still has a lot more great moments than rough ones and recovers well. and we’re slowly learning to feel each other out and learning how to get through them mostly unscathed.
but it can get irksome, him trying our patience all the time.

last night when i was tip-toeing out of his bedroom after he fell asleep, i noticed how huge he is. he takes up nearly the whole mattress (crib mattress, on the floor at this point). he’s a kid > baby now. and he has to learn how to be independent and make his own decisions and there’s going to be some growing pains while he figures that out.

and i like that he’s his own henry and not just a little barnacle on us anymore. it’s more fun than frustrating most of the time.

we’re all a work in progress, i guess.

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