Why in the world am I giving up alcohol for an entire year, you ask? It turns out that that’s 12 whole months! (365 days. 8,760 hours. 525,600 seconds.) How could I, when wine and I have become so close?! What did she ever do to me!? Well…..I think she (and her buddies tequila and …
There are many areas to which I intend to apply change in myself, and I think they will all suck equally, but we have to start somewhere- so let’s begin with the physical stuff. (Ugggggh) My body is a temple. This temple. A few things I want to get off my chest here (besides multiple …
I turned 39 yesterday. I’ve been giving this 40th year of life “me project” a lot of thought. I’ve decided to aggressively care for myself. As if I’m worth it. Like, instead of indulging myself or letting myself hide from the things I ought to be, I’m going to helicopter-parent and tiger mom the shit …
Ok, so, I’ve been talking to my lady friends about what self-care means to us. It’s been concluded that women tend to take care of everyone else before ourselves and have historically been punished for taking the time to do anything for ourselves or setting boundaries in our relationships (seen as selfish, high-maintenance, or, God …
1. Now she can make her own waffles! (She eats them frozen straight out of the box and leaves the freezer door ajar, but still). No more wrestling with your kids over sunscreen. 2. She mostly has the toilet thing worked out. You’ll be indoors now, so no more ethical conundrum about whether to let your kids pee in the woods (right next to the t-ball diamond) or off boats, or whatnot. 3. Daycare is now school, so it’s free and …
I’ve decided that the last trendy thing I’m paying attention to was this song and video. That’s it. I hope you liked it, because that’s as cool as I’m ever going to try to be ever again. I’m done. No more. Just stay the same. Not same is weird and I feel left out and …
I got pulled over the other day, for speeding in a place where I always drive, and I always speed. The officer was so quick and polite and had the kindest eyes, so when he “let me off” with “just a” ticket for impeding traffic or starting a riot or some such, I thought I’d …
you know that thing where you age and you’re confused by everything? i’m not old. i’m 35. that’s not even half my lifespan. and if i keep eating this weird vegan food it may be only, like, 1/6th my lifespan or something. (kale might make you live longer, does nothing for your math) but i’m …
once upon a time there was a little boy named henry. he was a very little boy but he had some very big brave when he went to the dentist for a filling. and he used his very big words to make the dentist laugh. his mom made him brush his teeth on the way …
so i’m sitting in a honda dealer’s lounge while i type this. i’m waiting for them to make a replacement key (with fob and all the $$ fancy stuff) for my car because i ‘aped’ (to ape= to aggressive manhandle and destroy in a fit of rage) robb’s copy of my key. it was a …